2 steps forward and 1 step back

17 04 2009

I ate like crap today. In the midst of my obsession with fresh, I took a break and ate a party time sausage in a tortilla, a peanut butter and jam sandwich (although the jam was made by yours truly) on white bread and a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Not exactly garden fresh kind of stuff. In fact, I didn’t eat a single vegetable today (which is pretty odd for me). I think some of it has to do with the fact that I didn’t work out today or yesterday. Yesterday I went to the gym with every intention of enjoying my Pilates and Zumba classes, but 15 minutes into Pilates, I realized that my allergies were not going to allow me the oxygen or the necessary equilibrium to finish. Today I just wasn’t very motivated. Whenever I take a break from the gym, my eating habits tend to regress. I don’t think that was the whole story, though. I checked out Harvest For Hope by Jane Goodall from the library today along with Animal, Vegetable, Miracle to reread. It feels very ironic to be poring over reading material about the gluttony of the American Way while I eat mint chocolate chip ice cream, but it feels a bit like Mardi Gras for me. I know that the more information I take in about our food sources and the effects that they have on our world (and our health), the more concerned I will become with it. I understand why most people don’t want to think about this kind of stuff. You can’t educate yourself and then ignore it. At some point, you have to act on that knowledge. I can foresee a point in the not so distant future when I won’t allow myself to indulge in convenience foods at the cost of my conscience. So for right now, it feels like that last guilty splurge before a long Lenten season. Even though my main concern is the health of my family, a part of me feels like a kid whose about to have my candy taken away.

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